'The chain of contempt at the time of picking up the baby': Children are always picked up by their parents at the latest, which is easy to form an inferiority complex
Some time ago, I saw a video on the Internet. At the entrance of the kindergarten, a little boy saw his mother waiting at the door, and immediately rushed out of the school gate with joy. The child cried while hugging his mother: "Mom, you are really the first to come. Pick me up!"
After watching the video, netizens burst into tears, especially parents with children. Presumably when most parents send their children to kindergarten, they will promise him: "Mom/Dad will be the first to pick you up after school!" Maybe the parents just say this casually to comfort the child, but the child will Take it to heart, the first one to see her parents after school will be very happy.
But the work is so busy that not every parent can pick up their children on time. Some are the elderly at home to pick up their children, and some parents let their children stay in the kindergarten to play and pick up their children after work.
As a result, a "chain of contempt for baby picking time" was formed among kindergarten parents. I heard this from a friend of mine who reluctantly said that she was at the end of the "chain of contempt for baby time".
This friend is the manager of the company, with a monthly salary of over 10,000 yuan, but he has a lot of work and often has to work overtime. Therefore, every time a friend picks up the child, there are only a few lonely children left in the kindergarten waiting for their parents. The teacher persuaded her more than once to pick up the child earlier, and the child was also unhappy: "Mom, if you don't come, I will be the only one left!"
My friend knew that she was very sorry for the child. Once, she had less get off work, so she deliberately got off work early and picked up her child at 4 o'clock. She thought she was the first parent to arrive. Unexpectedly, many parents had already gathered at the gate of the kindergarten.
After chatting with the parents, my friends learned that there is a naturally formed "chain of contempt" between the parents. At the top are the parents who come to pick up their children at 12:00 noon . Because their children basically play games and take a nap in the afternoon, they take their children home and teach them by themselves. Most of these parents are top students who have returned from overseas.
The parents who are in the middle are the parents who come to pick up their children at 4 o'clock. After receiving their children from the gate of the kindergarten, they send the children to the gate of the interest class, and use the remaining time to let the children learn some specialties.
The last one is the parents who come to pick up their children after 6 o'clock. After bringing their children home, they have dinner. After watching cartoons and playing games with their children, they take a bath and go to bed.
Friends are worried: other people's children enroll in various interest classes, but their own children do not learn anything, will they fall behind others?
Judging from this so-called "chain of contempt for pick-up time", parents don't seem to care too much about picking up their children sooner or later. Instead, they care more about whether their children are better than others. So, I advised my friends: "At this time, don't think about what class to register for your child, you always pick up your child so late, you should take more care of your child's mood, and spend more time cultivating feelings with your child, otherwise Children will grow increasingly resentful and alienated from their parents.”
But in the hearts of children, there are expectations for the order in which they are picked up, and almost every child hopes that they will be the first to be picked up. And the children who were picked up by their parents at the latest watched other children being picked up, and their expectations fell again and again. Children will feel afraid, anxious, easily emotional, and often get angry with their parents.
How should parents take care of their children's emotions?
01 Talk to your child about the time in advance
When sending their child to kindergarten in the morning, parents must agree with the child when they will pick him up today, so that the child has an idea. And after the agreed time, the parents must arrive on time. If they are always not punctual, the children will no longer trust their parents after many disappointments.
02Choose a kindergarten close to home
Choose a kindergarten close to home for your child, so that parents can save a lot of time when picking up their children, and most of the kindergartens will have some children from neighbors of the same age, so even if the parents are unable to pick up the children in time, they can ask the neighbors to drop by the way. The children are brought back together.
03 Spend more time with your children at home
Children lack a sense of security and have low self-esteem because their inner emotional needs have not been met. Instead of sending their children to interest classes to learn various specialties, parents should spend more time with their children, establish a close emotional connection with their children, and cultivate their self-confidence and optimistic character.