Professor Li Meijin: There are four kinds of rebellion in the child, the mother must fight if she should, and she can't get used to it
Children's education has always been a headache for parents. In the concept of the older generation, children are "unqualified". Today's parents are more concerned about their children's psychological growth and believe that beating and scolding their children cannot solve the fundamental problem.
When faced with a child's mistakes, parents are always worried that heavy punishment will damage the child's self-esteem and self-confidence;
Parents' "concession" as a child made her "suicide" when she grew up
Wang Xiao's daughter Yiyi is 3 years old. Recently, Yiyi seems to have entered a "rebellious period". She likes to do everything against her parents. The more Wang Xiao doesn't let her do it, the more she wants to do it.
While shopping that day, Yiyi took a fancy to a doll and asked her mother to buy it. Wang Xiao said that there were already a lot of dolls at home, and the ones that were bought before were not played much, so they will not buy them this time.
But Yiyi wanted to buy it, but after crying, she lay outside the store and rolled.
Looking at the pitiful daughter, Wang Xiao's heart softened. She thought, anyway, a doll is not worth much, and her daughter can buy it if she likes it, it's better than making her sad. So Wang Xiao compromised.
In the blink of an eye, Yiyi is in junior high school. Seeing that many students in the class have smartphones, she also wanted to buy one, but Wang Xiao felt that children in junior high school had weak judgment and were easily disturbed by bad information on the Internet.
No matter what Yiyi said, her mother was unmoved. She cried and said that her parents didn't love her anymore, and she wanted to commit suicide. This frightened Wang Xiao. In order to fear that her daughter would mention suicide again, she had to agree to buy a mobile phone.
It is precisely because of Wang Xiao's uncontrolled "indulgence" of her daughter that Yiyi knows that as long as she threatens her parents, she can get what she wants.
Professor Li Meijin: There are four kinds of rebellion in children, and they have to be beaten
Many parents feel that their children are ignorant when they are young, and even if they make mistakes, they cannot bear to blame their children too much. Maybe when a child is three or four years old, he will only make his parents compromise by crying and cheating, but when they reach the age of thirteen or fourteen, once their parents cannot meet their demands, they may make some extreme behaviors to threaten their parents. At that time, it may be too late to think about how to discipline the children properly.
Therefore, when children are young, parents should set good rules for their children and stick to them. Only by establishing the authority of the parents and "giving both kindness and power" to the children, can the children form good upbringing and habits.
Professor Li Meijin believes that when a child has the following four kinds of rebellious behavior, parents must not tolerate it, and they should be beaten.
- Disrespect for elders
Respect for elders is one of the basic principles of life. If children are not polite since childhood, they will be "arrogant" when they grow up. Parents should teach their children to be polite from an early age. If they find that their children are disrespectful to their elders, they should correct them in time.
- There are no rules
As the saying goes: there are no rules and no square. The harmony of society and interpersonal communication is established under a certain order. Children without rules can become lawless, unable to adapt to society, and even go to extremes when they grow up. Therefore, parents should let their children know the truth and rules of life from an early age.
- Curse and throw things when you lose your temper
Everyone has moments of emotional instability, especially children. When children are unhappy, parents should teach their children to vent their emotions in a reasonable way, rather than venting through bad actions such as swearing and throwing things. Otherwise, when you grow up, it will be difficult to deal with your own emotions and make behaviors that hurt others and yourself.
- If you are not satisfied, you will threaten your parents
As children grow older and want more and more things, they will make demands and conditions with their parents. If the child is crying and cheating, the parents will compromise, then the child will gain an inch, and when it is not satisfied, it will threaten the parents with extreme behavior, forming a vicious circle.
If a child exhibits some of the above behaviors, parents need to take it seriously, and if necessary, they can also use "stick education" to let the child learn from it. Of course, children's growth is always full of "contradictions" with their parents' expectations. More often, parents should use their own words and behaviors to infect their children. Good communication is the fundamental way to solve problems.
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