Child crime has become a social criticism, and parents have an inescapable responsibility

Some time ago, everyone must have been stunned by the incident of a junior high school student Cai in Dalian killing 10 girls, and now the family of the victim girl is immersed in extreme sadness, but the suspect is still under 14. The verdict that Sui faced was only temporarily placed in a shelter for rehabilitation.

The most icy and angry thing is that the family of the young middle school student Cai, who was involved in the incident, did not express any opinions or views on the matter, and did not even have the will to apologize. Cai's uncle's remarks in the interview were also inconsistent, obviously shirk responsibility, which made the majority of netizens even more angry.

It is not difficult to find that there are many similar cases of juvenile delinquency, among which the more egregious cases have caused heated discussions and debates. For example, a 13-year-old boy in Sichuan actually poured gasoline on a mobile phone To a female teacher who passed by the roadside, and set it on fire. When the raging fire burned on the female teacher, the female teacher screamed for help. Facing this unbearable horror scene, the 13-year-old The boy just turned a blind eye and picked up the mobile phone dropped by the female teacher on the ground, and ran away without looking back.

According to a follow-up report later, the murdered female teacher had burns all over her body, and her fingers needed to be amputated because she had been burned and lost her ability to move.

According to insiders, the boy has been fond of causing trouble since he was a child, and his father locked him at home with chains to prevent him from going out to cause trouble.

In fact, many parents have this kind of feeling. When facing their grown-up children, they suddenly feel a sense of strangeness. They find that the once well-behaved and sensible children have become fierce and irritable. Parents can no longer control their children's actions, and they have already It is useless to say or not to listen, to scold...

When I want to discipline the child and solve the problems that exist or arise in the child, I can only shake my head helplessly, and sum up in four words: it's too late.

In response to the social phenomenon of child crime, Professor Li Meijin, who graduated from Renmin University of China and is now Renmin Public Security University, explained to us a lot of knowledge and insights about child crime.

Professor Li Meijin has long been engaged in the research on criminal psychology and juvenile psychological problems. He has conducted detailed investigations on many cases, and thus proposed that crime prevention should start with the education of minors.

This means that it is clear that the parent's educational methods during the growth stage of their children have a great impact on their children. Parents have an inescapable responsibility for the phenomenon of children's crimes.

One: What might cause a child to develop a criminal mind?

1. Own congenital causes

The latest research shows that the behavior of a child at the age of 4 to 5 can already determine whether he is likely to commit a crime.

There is such a type of people in human beings, they are born with ''criminal genes'', their possibility of committing crimes is extremely high, each of us normal people are essentially philanthropists and are sympathetic , which is a basic emotional attribute, but there are still some special children who lack the ability to love and have no good thoughts in their hearts.

Their life dictionary is only: ruthless, selfish.

2. Parents' ''violent'' education

Some parents are very irritable. When their children make mistakes or behave contrary to their own wishes, they like to use force to punish their children, which is very detrimental to their growth. The use of violent education on children is easy to cause physical and mental harm to children, and long-term development can easily lead to children's personality becoming inferior, withdrawn or emotionally fluctuating, and easy to be impulsive and irritable.

3. The impact of parental misbehavior

This is the reason why parents do not set good examples and role models. Specifically, their words and deeds can have a subtle, profound and lasting impact on their children. Children are like a mirror of their parents. If parents often act in front of their children, A bad behavior, the child sees it in his eyes and remembers it in his heart, and will blindly imitate it involuntarily.

4. Disharmony in family relations

It is not difficult to find that children who grow up in a discordant family relationship are more likely to commit crimes because of the influence of their parents. For example, if the father likes to drink and beat others, the child may be often angered. If parents often quarrel and divorce, and ignore their children's feelings, it is easy to cause their children to be neglected, and to feel lonely and inferior, and they like to close themselves up.

Soong Ching Ling once said: ''Children's characters and talents are, in the final analysis, deeply influenced by their families, parents, especially mothers. As children grow up, society becomes the environment in which they are trained. Schools also play an important role in the development of young people. But it is the family that leaves an indelible mark on a person. ''

Parents pay attention to their children's education, which is of great significance to their children's growth.

Regarding the importance of parents raising their children and accompanying their children's growth and the requirements of each stage, Professor Li Meijin said this:

Please bring your own children before the age of 1, say no to the children before the age of 6, and pay attention to psychological support before the age of 12.

Two: Parents don’t pay attention to their children’s education and companionship. What is the impact on children?

1. Psychological Distortion

Everyone is very dependent on their relatives in childhood, especially infants. This is an instinct that comes from the bottom of the heart. When feeling lonely or fearful, the first time a child feels Longing for the protection of their parents, they can’t help but want to be close to their parents, but if the parents do not accompany the children, or even the fear of loneliness comes from the parents, it is easy for the children to be unsatisfied, become lonely and eccentric, and psychologically distorted.

2. Children are prone to developing bad habits

Parents are children’s first teachers, and they also have the most profound impact on children’s lives. The formation of many habits requires parents’ training and training. However, if parents seldom accompany their children or do not pay attention to their children’s education, children will suffer. There will be no awareness of this aspect. When encountering bad habits, because they are not prevented, it is easy to develop bad habits and affect future development.

3. Be ruthless

Why are those juvenile criminals so ruthless and indifferent and ignorant in the face of the victims' horrific calls for help and unbearable injuries? This may also be related to the parents. If a person does not receive training and training in compassion and empathy when he knows it, does not have a sense of thinking about others, or is often treated indifferently by his relatives, and does not experience the warmth of affection from his relatives, Instead, he was hurt, and over time, he would become ruthless and become a demon who kills without blinking an eye.

Three: What should parents do to cultivate a mentally sound and obedient and sensible child?

1. Pay attention to the cultivation of children's character

The vast majority of children who embark on the road of crime have problems with character development in childhood.

Personality is very important to a person's development. Parents should spend more time with their children, get to know them, let them feel the warmth of family, give them more encouragement to make them more confident, and bring them more parent-child interactions to make them cheerful. A person's character absolutely determines his attitude towards doing things, and a person's attitude towards things determines his actions and behaviors. Children are cheerful, confident, sunny and lively, which has a huge role in promoting future development, and can also eliminate criminal psychology with great probability. produce.

2. Let children have a sense of rules

Before the age of 6 is the best period to set rules for children. The age of 6 to 12 is the incubation period of personality. After the age of 12, it is a rebellious adolescence. Therefore, when the child is young, it is necessary to start to set rules for the child appropriately. To let the child have this awareness, it is not that his behavior is uncontrollable, but it must be within an appropriate range. In addition, sometimes the rules also play a role in promoting the child's growth and learning, and at the same time let him know that some things cannot be done, such as criminal behavior, which must not be touched, and will cause harm to himself and others.

3. Parents act as role models

In front of children, do not act violently. Impulsivity is the devil. Even if you are angry, you should tell yourself to calm down and solve the problem in the right way. When parents do this, it reduces the fear and harm caused to their children, and it also provides a good demonstration education for children, telling them to use appropriate methods to release negative emotions, and temporary impulsiveness may bring irreparable pain. cost.

The growth of children, we as parents need to spend more time and energy, let the children grow up healthily and happily, become an excellent person, and have a bright and bright future, it is your duty and my responsibility.